Starting on my journey

 

Why did I pick the title and subtitle I did? Because my brain is like that meme.  Anyone that knows me will tell you that it takes me forever to tell a story, or get to the point.  There is always a back story, or multiple side bars before I get to the point.  It’s not intentional, it’s just how my brain works.  And in my mind, every side bar or back story is necessary to get to the point. 

So this is a journey of less, to hopefully get to more. To escape the life I no longer want and get to something that resembles what I do want.  To do that will take less. Much less of most everything. So that I can get to more of what I do want in life. Starting this journey at 50? Absolutely crazy. But better late than never. 

There will be lots of laughs and lots of tears along this journey, at least for me. And I will take all of the back stories and side bars along the way, because they are all a part of my story to how I got here and where I hope to go. 

The less part of the journey:

I have been decluttering for years. And somehow things always seem to accumulate again or I just didn’t make it completely to the point I wanted to get to.  Two years ago I did a major declutter when I walked away from my long marriage and everything else, except my daughter and our clothes & few personal belongings. And aside from all the major emotions involved in that moment, it felt good to have so much less.  Except we really did need furniture, dishes, towels, and the other things we had grown used to in life. So we got those. And slowly things crept back in as we tried to recreate normalcy and the life we had. It’s nothing like it was before. I remember one move with the biggest U-Haul they made packed to the brim, and we still left stuff behind.  I’ve come a long way since then, but I would like to get better.

You see somewhere in my mind, or heart, is the desire to travel. To move lightly and not need much. Maybe live in a tiny house or RV full time and travel where I want. But to live with just what I need and the few other things that make me happy. And that requires less.  Less than I have currently.

There is another form of less. Less debt. You see when you walk away with nothing really and you are suddenly on one income and trying to recreate a normal life, debt quickly finds its way to you just trying to survive. Debt is stress, so much stress. The kind that is making me physically ill. There is a back story that will perhaps find its way here in the future, but for now I’ll go with debt and physically ill. So I need to find all the ways that I can get myself out of debt, so I can have less stress and less physical illness and hopefully that leads to more.  More physical and mental energy, because I am so very very exhausted. The past few years of my life have brought me to this place. So how to find a way out of debt that doesn’t involve me working more hours than I already do, because I can’t physically or mentally take much more effort and still survive.

More

I want more happiness, more energy, more travel, more fun. More life. There has to be more to life than struggling just to survive and pay the bills. Of struggling through a work week, just waiting on the 2 days off for the weekend, so I can sleep and be somewhat recharged to survive another week, rinse and repeat. 

I don’t need more things or more money, once I’m out of debt. I just want more of what life should be.

And so this is my journey of less. And hopefully more.